You’ve heard the stories. It’s online dating, you know it’s ripe for strange experiences and bad dates. The truth is, there are lots of ways to avoid bad online dates and ways to minimize the ones you find yourself in. So how do you get out of a bad date?
- Talk on the phone with your date before making plans. It can tell you a lot before you get to the awkward point of a bad meeting. Have a quick chat, you don’t have to do it for more than a few minutes. If your date is weird, don’t make plans to go out. Easy- peasy.
- If call is good, make plans to meet with short time frame already built in. In other words, agree to something like meeting for a cup of coffee before you have to be at an other appointment. Don’t agree to a 3 hour boat ride where you can’t escape if it’s bad. By keeping your dates limited to a short time period, you know you only have to stay for a limited amount of time before you can bolt politely. This is the best way to get out of a date with the least amount of stress.
- Find the discord. Let’s say your date says something that is totally off the wall with something that is compatible with you. State your opinion and say, “Yeah you know, we probably aren’t a match because I believe in ____ and that’s important to me to have in common. Cool to meet you and down to depart as friends if that’s ok with you?”
- Bring enough cash to cover your bill. This way you don’t want to have to wait for server to bring you a bill if things are a dead end.
- Last but not least, your mindset determines whether or not you have a bad first date. You can handle nearly any bad date/non-attraction if you see it as an opportunity instead of something you need to escape from. Go in with the idea that you can just try to make a friend or learn something new. Let’s say your date is NOT your cup of tea but he/she is a finance nerd and you’ve been wondering if your 401k is the best place for your money. Pick his/her brain for a bit and then say you need to get going.
The best thing you can do with a bad date is to just be nice, but real. Tell them if you’re not a fit for each other and wish them well. You don’t need to make it any more complicated than that.